Category: Funny Stuff


Wednesday, November 30, 2005

[b]IT’S JOKE TIME![/B]

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a
young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor said,

“We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must
abstain from having sex for two weeks.”

The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The
pastor went to the elderly couple and asked, “Were you able to
abstain from sex for the two weeks?”

The old man replied, “No problem at all, Pastor.”

“Congratulations! Welcome to the church!” said the pastor. The
pastor went to the middle-aged couple and asked, “Well, were you
able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?”

The man replied, “The first week was not too bad. The second week
I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes, we
made it.”

“Congratulations! Welcome to the church!” said the pastor. The
pastor then went to the newlywed couple and asked, “Well, were
you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?”

“No Pastor, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks”
the young man replied sadly.

“What Happened?” inquired the pastor.

“My wife was reaching for a can of paint on the top shelf and
dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with
lust and took advantage of her right there.”

“You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in
our church,” stated the pastor.

“We know,” said the young man, “we’re not welcome at Home Depot
anymore either.”

Posted by CHANNI on 11/30 at 02:52 AM in Funny Stuff
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Saturday, November 26, 2005

[b]ORDERING A PIZZA IN THE YEAR 2010[/b]

THIS IS SO DEEP-IT’S SCARY!
------Click the link and see… turn up the volume. 
Listen closely and watch the screen and cursor carefully. 

http://www.aclu.org/pizza/images/screen.swf

Posted by CHANNI on 11/26 at 11:37 AM in Funny Stuff
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Wednesday, November 23, 2005

[b]CONVERSATION AT THE PEARLY GATES[/B]

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation.
“How’d you die?” the first man asks the second.

“I froze to death,” says the second.

“That’s awful,” says the first man. “How does it feel to freeze
to death?”

“It’s very uncomfortable at first,” says the second man.

“You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and
toes. But eventually, it’s a very calm way to go. You get numb
and you kind of drift off, as if you’re sleeping. How about you,
how did you die?”

“I had a heart attack,” says the first man. “You see, I knew my
wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home
unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone,
knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding
there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was
hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and
just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died.”

The second man shakes his head. “That’s so ironic,” he says.

“What do you mean?” asks the first man.

“If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we’d both still
be alive.”

Posted by CHANNI on 11/23 at 07:44 AM in Funny Stuff
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Saturday, November 19, 2005

real american hero bud light

I just downloaded a bunch of these incredibly funny Bud Light commercials.  Email me if you want some.

http://www.google.com/search?q=real+american+hero

Posted by SPN on 11/19 at 09:24 PM in Funny Stuff
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Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Help Georgie avoid the big mean spheres!

http://www.planetdan.net/pics/misc/georgie.htm

Posted by SPN on 09/27 at 02:03 PM in Funny Stuff
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Tuesday, August 02, 2005

The Barbeque

Now that BBQ season has arrived, it is perhaps a good idea to remind one and all of the tremendous significance of barbecues in the fabric of society and why men have barbecued meat from the dawn of civilization. Keep up the good work, men!

The BBQ

It’s the only type of cooking a real man will do.  When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill—beer in hand. Here comes the important part .....

4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

MORE...
Posted by loni on 08/02 at 07:23 AM in Funny Stuff
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Tuesday, July 05, 2005

get your war on

How stupid can you be to believe we can defeat terrorism?

http://www.mnftiu.cc
image

Posted by SPN on 07/05 at 01:03 PM in Funny Stuff
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Saturday, July 02, 2005

Wally, Dilbert’s peer can never seem to keep his mouth shut.

He kinda sounds like me!

image

Posted by SPN on 07/02 at 10:15 AM in Funny Stuff
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Friday, June 24, 2005

Funny t-shirt.

image

Posted by SPN on 06/24 at 01:38 PM in Funny Stuff
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“ It’s a 100 Grand, not $100,00 as a prize “

BIG UPS to Ms. Gill for CLEARLY stating she’s NOT referring to a damn candy bar…

http://www.kentucky.com/mld/kentucky/11968026.htm
By JAMIE GUMBRECHT—Lexington (Ky.) Herald-Leder

A Lexington woman who says she was jilted by a-WLTO-102.5 FM contest filed a lawsuit yesterday against Cumulus Media Inc., which owns Hot 102 and four other local stations.

The complaint, filed in Fayette Circuit Court, says the radio station and its Atlanta-based parent company breached a contract to pay $100,000 after a radio contest prize was revealed to be a caramel-filled candy bar, Nestle’s 100 Grand, instead of cash.

On May 25, night host DJ Slick said he wanted to thank people who listened throughout the American Idol finale by sponsoring a contest to “win 100 grand.” “No joke,” the host’s Web blog said of the contest. 
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/graphics/art3/0623051grand4.jpg

Norreasha Gill won by listening to the radio show throughout the night and being the 10th caller just before the Idol winner was announced. As family members rushed to her house to celebrate, she screamed over the airwaves and began describing what she would do with $100,000, she said.

Posted by 360DIVA on 06/24 at 10:34 AM in Funny Stuff
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